Flight 4477

City of stars, are you shining just for me?

Where in the world do I fit? Where is my place? Is my mindset based on reality or my desired reality? Should you stop thinking and analyzing so much and just laugh more? Probably. Would that be possible for you? Is that even you? Probably not.

City of stars, there’s so much that I can’t see.

Let’s take a step back. Let’s forget the existential, overarching, impossible-to-answer questions. (But those are so fun!) I agree, but not right now, D. My sister encouraged me to post more often, and not just when I feel the strong urge to dive into something deep.

I don’t care if I know just where I will go, because all I need is this crazy feeling.

 Thoughts gathered on Flight 4477:

1)   It’s okay to not be okay. Just don’t stubbornly live there.

2)   It’s okay to be the person that is brought to tears by a song, and it’s also okay to never cry. Just be honest about it and honor that emotion. 

3)   I desperately wish that travel could be made easier, cheaper, or faster. Maybe even all three. Maddening when you want to see and do everything.

4)   That being said, I think I could have Wisconsin Bloody Mary’s every weekend and be content. My Lord.

5)   It’s okay to grow and evolve -to change your beliefs or stance. To change your likes and dislikes. To change your opinions. It’s a different story to do this is you are scared of a reaction or you’re thinking of what other people will think. Believe or think something because any other way just wouldn’t feel right/good.

6)   Everyone is human. Everyone will hurt you. Everyone will treat you poorly at some point. Forgive them. They are most likely killing themselves over how much they hurt you.

7)   Mad props to flight attendants. I’m jet lagged and annoyed by people after like 45 min.

8)   Love is alive all over the world, but most importantly inside you. If you don’t believe that, you have nothing. If you don't feel it's alive for you, lean on your family and friends until it is. 

9)   Let yourself grieve. If you lose something/someone you love, grieve. Don’t let anyone else tell you that you shouldn’t.

10)  Communicate. Stop assuming how someone else feels. No matter how much you think you know how they feel, ask. Talk.

11)   Words are powerful. They mean something. Use them wisely. 

12)  Ed Sheeran’s new album is actually quite good.

13)   Spearmint = best gum flavor. 

14)   It’s okay to hold on to hope. It’s okay to dream about something that will probably never happen. Just don’t let it consume you. Dream forward.

15)   2017 is going to be different than 2016. Much different.

16)  Text someone you haven’t talked to in a long time after you read this. Most likely it wasn’t either of your faults that you haven’t talked in awhile. Just say hi, or tell them you miss them. Getting those texts feels good.

17)   Sometimes life is incredible and other days it sucks. Smile anyway while being real about what’s going on inside.

18)   I absolutely will never take for granted working at Indeed and having the flexibility to see my family so often. On the same note, never take anything or anyone for granted. Trust me on that one.

19)   Is it normal to lose the magic? Is that standard “childhood to adulthood” procedure? When does this process begin?

20)   You only get one person who knows you best. It’s temporary, everybody else.

21)    Please stop talking to me about the weather. Begging ya.

22)   Lea Michele – new album soon. Full out Glee fan-girling. The first single “Love is Alive” is a great preview.

23)    My dad’s team won their Regional! On to Sectionals this week. Their team reminds me a lot of my High School team. If they don’t win it this year, I’ll be betting on a state championship next year.

24)    I missed someone this weekend. I also hurt someone. Stepping back and realizing that both of those things are okay. The first one won’t change. The second I can remedy.  I am a work in progress. I am still turning out. Reflection is not assuming you know the answers. I don't. 

25)   There HAS to be a more efficient way of getting from Fairfield County to LGA.  Suggestions welcome.

Songs of the week:

• Happier – Ed Sheeran
• Both Sides Now – Joni Mitchell
• Settle – Jordan Smith
• Helium – Sia
• 1000 Nights – Frenship